Chain Emails Are The Way Fw:Fw:FW:Re:Fw:RE:FW.
of 44 votes, 14% like it
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Sleep: So Easy I Could Do It With My Eyes Closed.
of 41 votes, 37% like it
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Bear With Me, It's A Grizzly.
of 70 votes, 17% like it
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Actions Speak Louder Than Words, Except Words With Loudspeakers.
of 67 votes, 21% like it
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Despite Popular Belief, Grapevines Are Poor Information Carriers.
of 80 votes, 36% like it
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I Remember When A Google Was Just A Number.
of 70 votes, 24% like it
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Keyboards: The Quickest Way From A-Z.
of 66 votes, 27% like it
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Shoelace Lovers Untie.
of 70 votes, 33% like it
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I Take Every Chance I Can. I Also Take Every Community Chest.
of 73 votes, 32% like it
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I Take Chances Every Day. I Also Pass Go.
of 92 votes, 29% like it
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I'm A Risk Taker. Some Call It Board Game Stealer.
of 90 votes, 29% like it
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INVISIBILITY. I'm Hoping To See It Through.
of 80 votes, 43% like it
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I Tried Embracing Change, But Change Didn't Want
To Know.
of 69 votes, 23% like it
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I'm A Changed Person Now! (My Other Shirt Was Dirty)
of 62 votes, 29% like it
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I Tried Raising The Bar, But I Dropped It On My Toes.
of 65 votes, 31% like it
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The Future's Bright. (That'll Be The Sun Exploding Then)
of 62 votes, 23% like it
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I've Been Taking Steps, But They Asked Me To Put Them Back.
of 87 votes, 48% like it
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I'm So / Math.
of 72 votes, 28% like it
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I Heart Object-For-Action Substitution.
of 60 votes, 18% like it
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RPGs: That's How I Role.
of 85 votes, 52% like it
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The Shape Of Things To Come Is An Equiangular Polygon.
of 59 votes, 24% like it
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(on BACK) To The Drawing Board!
of 71 votes, 27% like it
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BREAKING NEWS: Hammers Work Best.
of 74 votes, 28% like it
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There's A Time And A Place For Temporal Spatiality.
of 91 votes, 36% like it
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Walking Through Walls Is Less Impressive When Doors Are Involved.
of 113 votes, 53% like it
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Painting By Numbers Isn't Very Fun In Binary.
of 94 votes, 45% like it
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On A Scale Of One To Random, I'd Say This Sentence Is Fish.
of 111 votes, 50% like it
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He Hates People Who Talk In The Third Person.
of 95 votes, 40% like it
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There Is No Excuse For Laziness, Except Laziness.
of 93 votes, 41% like it
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I Think I'll Wear This Shirt Today.
of 87 votes, 31% like it
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Attention Scissors: We Will, We Will Rock You.
of 119 votes, 57% like it
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Geometry Is For Squares. And Several Other Shapes.
of 90 votes, 46% like it
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My Other Tee Is Another Tee.
of 86 votes, 26% like it
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If You're Happy And You Know It, Share Your Secrets.
of 86 votes, 33% like it
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Time Travelling Was Much More Fun In 2092.
of 106 votes, 58% like it
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Safety Is My Middle Name. It's Much Cheaper On The Insurance.
of 82 votes, 38% like it
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A Piece Of The Action Sounds Nice, But I'd Prefer The Whole Thing
of 99 votes, 49% like it
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Bluntness Just Doesn't Cut It With Me.
of 84 votes, 49% like it
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I Have No Hard Feelings About Cushions.
of 74 votes, 36% like it
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I Lack The Clothing Sense To Be Fashionably Late.
of 68 votes, 34% like it
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If You Take My Advice, Please Return It Later.
of 100 votes, 53% like it
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My Advice Is Always Good, Until I Give It To Someone Else.
of 77 votes, 35% like it
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Never Kick A Man When He's Down. Pick Him Up First.
of 78 votes, 33% like it
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Failure: If At First You Don't Succeed, You've Succeeded.
of 96 votes, 51% like it
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I Think I Think, Therefore It's Possible I Am.
of 78 votes, 35% like it
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I Have A Clear Conscience And A Terrible Memory.
of 83 votes, 40% like it
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Is This A Rhetorical Question Or What?
of 89 votes, 45% like it
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My Awesomeness Prevents Me From Being Modest.
of 78 votes, 44% like it
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Has Sentences Forming Trouble.
of 91 votes, 41% like it
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Referees Have No Choice But To Whistle While They Work.
of 92 votes, 49% like it
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Neither Guns Nor People Kill People. It's The Piercing Bullets.
of 83 votes, 41% like it
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I'm Not Afraid Of Dying, I Use Save Points.
of 79 votes, 33% like it
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Short Term Memory Loss Makes Meeting New Friends Easy.
of 97 votes, 51% like it
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Be Naughty And Nice. It Confuses Santa.
of 106 votes, 58% like it
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Don't Ask Me About Avoiding The Subject.
of 75 votes, 51% like it
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Alien Abductors Only Want You For Your Body.
of 81 votes, 38% like it
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I Robbed A Bank To Prove That Actually, Crime Does Pay.
of 89 votes, 53% like it
|
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Putting Your Money Where Your Mouth Is Isn't Safe Dietary Advice.
of 78 votes, 44% like it
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I Stopped Being An Archaeologist Because My Career Was In Ruins.
of 98 votes, 62% like it
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I Took Note And Was Accused Of Cheating.
of 65 votes, 46% like it
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I Tried Fishing For Compliments But My Line Wasn't Strong Enough
of 85 votes, 49% like it
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You Can't Spell Magic Without A Spell Book.
of 76 votes, 34% like it
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I Lack The Dexterity To Play It By Ear.
of 70 votes, 34% like it
|
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Having An Extra Pair Of Hands Would Be Handy.
of 88 votes, 52% like it
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Lately, I've Been Having Doubts About Being Unsure.
of 87 votes, 48% like it
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Since The Cloning Experiment, My Productivity Has Doubled.
of 90 votes, 49% like it
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A Little Birdie Told Me He Was Amazed I Could Understand Him.
of 85 votes, 46% like it
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My Lightning Reflexes Are Shockingly Quick.
of 75 votes, 37% like it
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The Story Of My Life Isn't As Epic As The Movie.
of 68 votes, 54% like it
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I Tried Paying Attention, But I Didn't Have Any Money.
of 69 votes, 49% like it
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I Brake Fast For Bacon And Waffles.
of 76 votes, 38% like it
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Space: It Just Got Personal.
of 82 votes, 48% like it
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Momentum: Friend To The Lazy.
of 62 votes, 35% like it
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Kleptomaniacs Are Always Walking A Mile In Somebody Else's Shoes
of 80 votes, 56% like it
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There's No Time Like The Present, And No Present Like $1,000,000.
of 90 votes, 51% like it
|
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If I Run Into A Problem, I Hope The Problem Isn't A Brick Wall.
of 80 votes, 40% like it
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Artists Need To Know Where To Draw The Line.
of 87 votes, 62% like it
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As An Undercover Agent, I Spend Most Of My Time In Bed.
of 85 votes, 49% like it
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The Snooze Button. Keeping The Dream Alive.
of 102 votes, 65% like it
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I Can Talk To Animals. They Usually Run Away Though.
of 75 votes, 64% like it
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A Rotten Apple A Day Keeps The Doctor From Going Away.
of 69 votes, 30% like it
|
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Winning Isn't Everything, Unless It's A Game Of Win Or Die.
of 77 votes, 53% like it
|
9 Out Of 10 Cannibals Agree: The 10th Was Delicious.
of 97 votes, 61% like it
|
Revenge Is Sweet. Sugar Coated Revenge In Maple Syrup Is Sweeter
of 83 votes, 45% like it
|
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I Have A Theory About Conspiracies.
of 91 votes, 65% like it
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Telepathy: The Best Excuse For Jury Duty.
of 83 votes, 46% like it
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Switching Two Words Can Make Sentence A Really Confusing.
of 78 votes, 60% like it
|
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My Sweet Tooth Didn't Taste As Good As I Thought It Would.
of 72 votes, 43% like it
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Eye Candy Doesn't Taste As Good As It Sounds.
of 63 votes, 54% like it
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Stealing Sweets From An Infant Is Like Taking Candy From A Baby
of 68 votes, 41% like it
|
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If A Cannibal Says Eat Your Heart Out, Be Wary.
of 71 votes, 52% like it
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I'm Not Daydreaming, I'm Evaluating The Current Situation.
of 75 votes, 64% like it
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I Spy With My Little Eye, Because My Big One Has Poor Vision.
of 77 votes, 48% like it
|
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I Spy With My Little Eye. It Sucks Having Disproportionate Eyes.
of 32 votes, 38% like it
|
Newton Was The First To Understand The Gravity Of A Situation.
of 76 votes, 59% like it
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Helium. Gravity. Mortal Enemies.
of 64 votes, 44% like it
|
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I'd Show You What I'm Made Of, But You Need A Powerful Microscope
of 59 votes, 46% like it
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I Can't Stand Intolerance
of 57 votes, 42% like it
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I'm Big On Stilts.
of 81 votes, 49% like it
|
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If You're Also Wearing This Shirt, Consider This Awkward.
of 71 votes, 51% like it
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If I'm Wearing This, It's A Good Day.
of 55 votes, 36% like it
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If You Don't Read This, I'll Give You One Dollar.
of 64 votes, 50% like it
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Narcissism Thinks I'm Great.
of 66 votes, 50% like it
|
Anagrams Cork.
of 79 votes, 51% like it
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I Reversed My Car Over Someone And Got Enoemos Revo Rac Ym.
of 73 votes, 42% like it
|
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WANTED: Schrodinger's Cat. Dead And Alive
of 79 votes, 59% like it
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When Opportunity Knock Knocks, It's A Joke.
of 81 votes, 58% like it
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The Key To My Heart Is A Surgical Knife.
of 66 votes, 35% like it
|
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Attention Vegetarians: Vegetables Are Being Killed To Feed You.
of 62 votes, 32% like it
|
If You're Happy And You Know It Please Keep It Quiet.
of 66 votes, 38% like it
|
A Spoonful Of Sugar Is Unsavoury Advice.
of 74 votes, 42% like it
|
|
I Thought I Was Crazy, But My Imaginary Friend Insists I'm Not
of 77 votes, 48% like it
|
Join My Non-Conformist Club.
of 72 votes, 47% like it
|
Being Shallow Has Got Me Out Of Deep Water Many Times
of 73 votes, 41% like it
|
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Yetis Are Cool. Probably Freezing.
of 67 votes, 43% like it
|
You Too Can Climb Small Ladders In 3 Easy Steps.
of 84 votes, 51% like it
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There Will Always Be A Special Place In My Heart For Oxygen.
of 91 votes, 53% like it
|
|
A Clown Stole My Money. Now He's Laughing At My Expense.
of 79 votes, 46% like it
|
Time Travellers Never Know What Yesterday Will Bring.
of 74 votes, 46% like it
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What Goes Around, Is A Perimeter.
of 75 votes, 47% like it
|
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The Hardest Thing About Being Really Rich Is That I'm Lying.
of 76 votes, 47% like it
|
I Have Mixed Feelings About DJing.
of 68 votes, 49% like it
|
Pickpockets. Proving Beggers CAN Be Choosers.
of 84 votes, 57% like it
|
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There's No Sense In Losing Touch.
of 77 votes, 44% like it
|
Criminal Master Mimes Do Unspeakable Things.
of 89 votes, 60% like it
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Nil, Zero And Zilch. They Mean Nothing To Me.
of 85 votes, 40% like it
|
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I Spend Half My Time On Cool Adventures. The Other Half I'm Awake
of 87 votes, 48% like it
|
Actions Don't Speak At All. Who Came Up With This Nonsense?
of 73 votes, 40% like it
|
I Have A Feeling I've Experienced Deja Vu Before.
of 74 votes, 31% like it
|
|
Angular Momentum. That's How I Roll.
of 97 votes, 53% like it
|
Loitering. Waiting's Nervous Cousin.
of 91 votes, 45% like it
|
Brains Before Brawn: A Zombie's Guide To Nutrition.
of 89 votes, 43% like it
|
|
Violence Is Not The Answer. The Crossword Clue Said 9 Letters.
of 99 votes, 54% like it
|
I Communicate With Ninjas: " "
of 76 votes, 30% like it
|
On Average I'm A Mean Person But If In The Right Mode, I'm Median
of 97 votes, 40% like it
|
|
Opportunity Knocked, Then Ran Away Laughing Hysterically.
of 98 votes, 44% like it
|
Life Is Not Like Any Of The Things It Is Compared To.
of 82 votes, 40% like it
|
When The Odds Are Against You, It's Time To Get Even.
of 94 votes, 61% like it
|
|
Magnetism Is Quite An Attractive Concept.
of 78 votes, 47% like it
|
Space Travelling Poets Write In Universe.
of 86 votes, 37% like it
|
I Must Be Behind On The Uranus Jokes.
of 78 votes, 33% like it
|
|
If I Was Really Living The Dream, You'd All Be Talking Carrots.
of 90 votes, 42% like it
|
Samurais: Ninjas Who Aren't Scared Of Making A Bit Of Noise.
of 89 votes, 51% like it
|
Change Is Inevitable, Unless You Paid The Exact Amount
of 97 votes, 60% like it
|
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When Nothing Is Going Your Way, You're Driving Dangerously
of 83 votes, 48% like it
|
When You Wish Upon A Star, Go For The Sun. It's Nearest.
of 84 votes, 49% like it
|
This Is My Bed Shirt. If You Can Read This, I'm Sleepwalking.
of 81 votes, 43% like it
|
|
Final, Terminal, Ultimate. Famous Last Words
of 70 votes, 33% like it
|
A World Without L Would Just Be A Word
of 74 votes, 39% like it
|
I Know How To Fight, I Just Can't Do It Very Well.
of 71 votes, 42% like it
|
|
Clouds. The Raining Champions Of The Sky.
of 98 votes, 39% like it
|
Desserts Hide Berried Treasure.
of 100 votes, 34% like it
|
A Piece Of Advice Is Free, But The Whole Thing Will Cost You.
of 104 votes, 34% like it
|
|
I'm Positive Negativity Surrounds Me.
of 106 votes, 39% like it
|
I Get My Kicks Out Of Mocking People. I Also Get Punches Too.
of 104 votes, 38% like it
|
We're On The Same Level. Thanks Multiplayer!
of 98 votes, 34% like it
|
|
There Are No Exceptions*
of 110 votes, 48% like it
|
Terms And Conditions Annoy Me*
of 61 votes, 49% like it
|
Make A Difference, Subtract One Number From Another.
of 113 votes, 49% like it
|
|
Time Travel Is So 3012, 1842 and 210BC.
of 112 votes, 42% like it
|
Without Math, I Couldn't Function.
of 116 votes, 41% like it
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I Went For A Brain Transplant, But Changed My Mind.
of 120 votes, 44% like it
|
|
Sidekicks. The Most Painful Of Buddies.
of 98 votes, 41% like it
|
Invisibility. There's Nothing To It.
of 109 votes, 39% like it
|
I Forget When The Memory Loss Started.
of 107 votes, 41% like it
|
|
BOXES AGAINST BEATBOXING.
of 98 votes, 36% like it
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Reverse Psychology: I Bet You Can't Think About It.
of 98 votes, 41% like it
|
Xylo. The Most Musical Of Phones.
of 104 votes, 37% like it
|
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When My Mind Goes Blank, I Try Not To Think About It.
of 102 votes, 35% like it
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(WRITTEN BACKWARDS). If You're Reading This, You Must Be A Mirror
of 107 votes, 38% like it
|
When I Get The Short End Of The Stick, I Poke The Others With It.
of 103 votes, 34% like it
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When I'm Not Around, I'm A Number Of Other Shapes.
of 92 votes, 30% like it
|
Architects Hate Constructive Criticism.
of 104 votes, 40% like it
|
Standing In The Way Gets You Fired At The Shooting Range
of 95 votes, 33% like it
|
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I Can Read Minds, But Only If They're Science Fiction.
of 87 votes, 34% like it
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If At First You Do Suceed, Then I Have No Useless Advice For You.
of 39 votes, 46% like it
|
Making An Entrance Is Easy. Just Use Dynamite.
of 93 votes, 38% like it
|
|
The Music Mafia Are Into Organised Rhyme.
of 84 votes, 37% like it
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Bad Eggs Hatch Evil Plans
of 100 votes, 35% like it
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I Abuse Chemistry To Get A Reaction.
of 97 votes, 39% like it
|
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Hygienic Zombies Brainwash Their Victims First.
of 94 votes, 34% like it
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I Can Teleport Behind People. Turn Around And I'll Show You.
of 72 votes, 35% like it
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When You're Down, Blame Gravity.
of 100 votes, 42% like it
|
|
Writing Music For A Living Gets Tiring. Music Music Music Music
of 95 votes, 39% like it
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My Psychic Powers Foretold That You'd Read This.
of 55 votes, 51% like it
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I Like To Work Out 24/7. It's 3.42857143.
of 118 votes, 50% like it
|
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Safety First, But Fun Before That.
of 95 votes, 38% like it
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Write A Bestseller. It's A Novel Idea.
of 63 votes, 48% like it
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I Always Go By The Books. One Day I'll Stop And Read One.
of 104 votes, 42% like it
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The Devil No Longer Wants Your Soul. He's Into Jazz These Days.
of 138 votes, 52% like it
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Actually, The Least I Could Do Is Nothing At All
of 141 votes, 55% like it
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Thesauruses Taught Me To Malign, Finagle And Purloin.
of 120 votes, 49% like it
|
|
A Penny For Your Thoughts Makes Money Fast With Quick Thinking
of 111 votes, 41% like it
|
Embrace Change. Poke Monotony In The Ribs.
of 104 votes, 40% like it
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Save Energy! Stay In Bed!
of 113 votes, 48% like it
|
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Be Different. Unexpect The Expected.
of 120 votes, 52% like it
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Know Your Rights! Befriend Your Lefts!
of 75 votes, 44% like it
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A Penny For Your Thoughts Gets You A Penny If You Think About It
of 84 votes, 49% like it
|
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I'm Open To Suggestions, But I Close Around 7:00pm.
of 107 votes, 46% like it
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I Can't Play Cards, But I Deal With It.
of 115 votes, 43% like it
|
Damn Stairs, They're Always Just One Step Ahead Of Me.
of 118 votes, 52% like it
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If I Had A Dollar For Every Dollar I Had I'd Be Twice As Rich.
of 106 votes, 45% like it
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Mathemetician Family Trees Have Square Roots.
of 121 votes, 48% like it
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Don't Fear The Reaper. Unless You Happen To Be Made Of Corn.
of 97 votes, 41% like it
|
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Typos: The Reason I Buttered My Beard This Morning.
of 130 votes, 52% like it
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I Also Speak Ninja: " "
of 32 votes, 44% like it
|
I'm In Touch With My Inner Child, And It's Kinda Squishy.
of 114 votes, 41% like it
|
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If You Happen To Be A Pearl, The World Really IS Your Oyster.
of 85 votes, 52% like it
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(on white tee) In Case Of Surrender: Wave Me.
of 126 votes, 50% like it
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(PRINTED ALL THE WAY ROUND THE SHIRT)You Get Around, Don't You?
of 108 votes, 40% like it
|
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I Work Out Every Day. Quadratic Equations Are My Favourite.
of 94 votes, 35% like it
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An Idea Hit Me, So I Punched It In The Face.
of 122 votes, 52% like it
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I WILL Rule The World. I Just Need A Tape Measure Big Enough
of 115 votes, 41% like it
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You're Reading This, In My Voice, In Your Head.
of 111 votes, 40% like it
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Decapitation: Quit While You're A Head!
of 104 votes, 38% like it
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(On Shoulder) If You Are Reading This, Polly Flew Away.
of 100 votes, 35% like it
|
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Grapevines: Good For Wine Production, Awful For Hearing Through.
of 111 votes, 39% like it
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10 out of 10 people agree: We all agree.
of 135 votes, 55% like it
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Hands up if you like putting your hands up.
of 113 votes, 37% like it
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The Asterisk: Censorship's Best F****** Friend.
of 116 votes, 46% like it
|
If you build it, they will come...and probably knock it down.
of 110 votes, 36% like it
|
Thesauruses rock, rule, own, lead govern, dominate, preponderate
of 137 votes, 49% like it
|
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Scientific relationships owe everything to carbon dating.
of 111 votes, 40% like it
|
I was stuck in a time paradox tomorrow.
of 117 votes, 46% like it
|
Knifing is bad. Spooning is good. Forking is better.
of 115 votes, 43% like it
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Ah, We Meet Again.
of 479 votes, 45% like it
|
